I believe that many times, people don't realize just how serious an eating disorder really is, and how deeply it can affect someone who is dealing with it. A lot of the time, there seems to be an idea that eating disorders aren't really that serious; that whoever lives with one is doing so of their on volition, purely because we want to be thin.
While I definitely believe that today's society has put an extreme emphasis on the idea that being thin is being beautiful, I also know from experience that eating disorders aren't solely about attaining that image. For me, personally, it was definitely more of a way for me to deal with the extreme amount of stress that I put myself through. I saw exercise as a way of escaping, and counted calories to have control over something, even when I felt like everything else was spinning out of control. The saddest thing is, what I thought I was controlling ended up taking over my life.
At one point, I was in complete denial, cried at pretty much anything, waaaay underweight, and more stressed out than I was in the beginning. What had started out as an interest in exercising and being healthy, became a very unhealthy obsession. I've gone through periods of depression, anxiety, I've fought with my family more than I ever had before. My eating disorder almost became a second personality. It wasn't just about being thin, it was about being obsessively in control. OCD at its worst, basically. It is something that I still deal with, and will probably always deal with my OCD in some form or another. What I'm learning to do is to never, ever go to extremes, to live a more balanced life, and guess what? to actually talk about things that are bothering me instead of bottling everything up inside. I found this chart to show just how much an eating disorder affects our bodies:
Well, that's about all I've got to say on the matter. If anyone out there is going, or has gone through the same thing, feel free to email me at healthychocoholic@yahoo.com.
In other matters, I'm sooo glad that today is Friday!!! What are you doing this weekend?
I think its wonderful that you are being so open about your ed
ReplyDeleteGood for you for sharing your story!! I can't say I know what it's like to go through an ed, but I do think it's important to realize the different causes and just how much it can affect a person. Hugs to you!
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteThis was a very couragious post! Body weight was always a problem for me and stress caused my over eating. Balance is the secret in all aspects of life. I am happy I can realise that now!
ReplyDeleteAwesome post friend :) it's such a scary thing and I can relate to the crying over everything and just feeling all around miserable. So glad you're in a better place now!
ReplyDeleteyou are so brave and strong for posting this! way to go GEN! an inspiration!
ReplyDelete